...the three bears looked at Goldilocks, then looked at each other and said "fuck it, lets eat the bitch"...
First of all I have realised what prompts comments from people...its sex, sex and more sex! lol...so in future, lets get sexy!
Secondly I would just like to ask all the charity companies that send me nice free pens to fill them up with ink...i received one today from the tight wads at cancer research and there was literally a couple of mls of ink in it...do they realise how much plastic is being wasted?...about 4 inches of plastic in each pen, unused, thrown away and not bio-degradable...how earth friendly is that you non thinking charity committee bastards...if you want me to stop moaning send me a full pen, you send me a full pen and i pay you money...its as simple as that...i urge you all to look at the refill when you get a free pen...lets start a revolution...
Ten Best Musicals Ever...(in my humble opinion)
1) The Sound of Music
2) My Fair Lady
4) Phantom of the Opera
5) Sunset Boulevard
6) Blood Brothers
7) Martin Guerre
10) Sweeney Todd
Lets talk about Male Circumcision...who wants a wiff of a cheesy cock. Sorry guys but no matter how clean you are down under, there is always an odour caused by the skin covering the oils that hover round the glans area. In my mid thirties I decided to do something about it and went for a circ...to be honest it was the most painful thing that I have ever been through and my bits looked like a watermelon surrounded by two oranges for a couple of weeks...but oh it was so worth it! Europeans do not have a history of circumcising males whereas the Americans put surgeons on auto pilot, straight for the cock as soon as they are born. I personally think that an unhooded cock is a lot more attractive and my op was mostly for cosmetic reasons. You may say that that is the ultimate vanity but I think guys can go through life really traumatised if they are not happy with the sight of their bits. Whenever you bring up circumcision at a dinner party or event, you can guarantee that guys ask you the same questions over and over again...'did it hurt', 'what does it feel like before, during and after', 'do you lose sensitivity', 'what does it feel like now when you knock one off', 'how do the other boys/girls like it' and in extreme cases 'can i see'!
I personally think that Doctors should be pushing male circumcision to parents more as it has been said to decrease the risk of certain cancers, it is also definitely more hygenic and a great thing is that it makes you last longer when performing (so everyone has a good time)...just remember though to keep the lube cupboard stocked as the natural slippiness isn't there...if anybody has any serious questions, don't be afraid to put them into comments...
Everything gets smaller in the end!...I am talking here about 'Wagon Wheels', 'Mars Bars', 'Curly wurly' and 'Texan' bars...its not just that I was a smaller person when i used to eat them...they are definitely smaller. The wagon wheel is now more like a 'weekend bag wheel', Mars bars are more like 'tiny little planet that hasn't got a name bar', Curly wurly are now more like 'Curl Wur' and Texan has become 'Dallas Bar'...sweetie manufacturers stop it now before the size of your products get any smaller. Its a rip off and its a disgrace...go screw yourselves.
...Peter Pan looked around angrily and retorted, "Okay, who called me the Michael Jackson of story land"...