Friday, June 10, 2005

Saturday Steve on a Friday!

"Eat shit and die you bastards!!"
Well here we are june 2005, weather is shit so far this "summer" apart from the last couple of days, forecast looks bleak for the weekend i think it's because neil 's pool is up and me uttering the immortal words "lets have a barbecue on friday night" and guess what the people who were invited have just cancelled {brilliant}, well it's just typical of my life at the moment, the other week, i played cricket at blunham and had a brilliant game, had a 50 run partnership batting with Chris and took a blinding one handed catch in the gully position unfortunatley we lost the game but on a personal note it was quite good, after the game we went to a pub in the village called "the horse shoe" had a pint and some friendly banter with with the other teams players and watched a bit of football that was on tv, i left after an hour got into the car and set off home, i got to Gt barford crossroads to turn left to Bedford but the fuckin road was closed due to them building the new by-pass so i had to go through Wilden all well and good i thought just wiil take a little longer to get home, right so i'm driving along this country lane singing along to thin lizzy and all of a sudden there is an almighty crunch underneath the car, i stop and get out to find that the back box had dropped off the car and wedged itself under the back axle {great} it's pitch black i'm on my own and stopped on a blind bend what do i do now? i said to myself, tried to pull the exhaust out with my hands and nearly suffered third degree burns, in the end i had to jack up the car and use my cricket bat to force it out, when i got it out i threw it in the boot and drove home sounding a bit like a tank, after finishing work on the following saturday i took the car to a local exhaust centrei said can you fix it ? he said yes we can! so they look under the car on the lift and come back with the news "err the exhaust is going to cost £233.50" when i got up off the floor i said "well you better fix it then" then he said "you need four tyres as well" i said "fuck off" he said "no" , "come and have a look" so i go and look and the front tyres had wire poking out from the inner wall, my heart sank, so he priced up four tyres which came to the princely sum of £175.00 making a grand total of £408.50 fantastic, so the next day was WORLD MOBY DAY and i had to raid my savings to go, oh! and i was ill but i have told you that haven't i, ha! ha!

Two weeks ago today some drunken wankers trashed the front garden of my house, it was 3am and i was sort of asleep or having a dream or something when i am awoken by Claire saying "the bastards, thats our pot they have just smashed" i looked out of the window and there is about ten people running down the street, then i realised Claire was outside too! then after a few minutes she came back in demanding i get out of bed to clear the mess up, me being half asleep i was not forthcoming but eventually i reluctantly got dressed and went down stairs to assist in the clean up, as we were doing this the same ten people came wandering by eating burgers and the like sniggering, amazingly i kept my cool and carried on clearing up the soil and broken pot but i did give them the stare, when they got a bit further on one of them pulled out a mobile phone and took a picture of us clearing the mess up {pissed up fuckin' chav} , so went back to bed and got no more sleep as you can imagine i was really happy about that.

today as i am writing this Edward is in bed asleep and i'm happily typing away when the calm is broken by an earsplitting scream from next door, yes the fuckin' loudmouthed chav bitches are at it again, but now there is another species living with them, the boyfriends, who for some reason do not like using the conventional method for vacating a property, instead of using the door like normal people they climb out of the bedroom window onto the roof of the kitchen jump off the roof into the back yard then vault over the back gate, Edward thinks its hilarious!, i did try and warn him that he could fall through the roof tiles but he just grunted at me and went on his way.

sorry if you were eagerly awaiting the next installment of my life story but i just needed a bit of a break from it and thought you may need one too, hopefully i will write the next part next week, hope you are all having a super weekend see you next week......................love steve...x

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

oh steve poor you - dont you just hate it when your car does something unexpected and your left with a huge hefty bill - story of my life i think lol Lisa xxx